Blog menu
Leah's Dating Blog

Themes

Archives

 

Online Dating

He asked for nudes. Now what?

Nude in makeup, nail polish and clothes is any light tone that reminds the skin color, such as light salmon, pearl and rosy beige. And it fits in with just about anything. A nude can also be an intimate photo or a spicy video. And it doesn’t always look good...
When there’s feeling involved, sometimes it's hard to say no. But even if you like the guy in a special way, is it worth uploading your pictures in sexy moments or intimate parts of your body to him?
The answer depends, among other factors, on the level of confidence you have in this guy. No cleavage, no sexy photo, nothing. Why? Because if you start sending pictures like this, the guy won’t stop insisting on you sending more and more spicy pics, and if you don’t send them, he’ll think you’re playing hard to get.
Of course, you’re not obligated to do anything, but it’s annoying to have someone repeating the same thing all the time and it can also create a bad vibe.
If you think that the guy is not mature enough, refuse to do it and never send him any nude. But I decided to write here some tips to use as an answer when the guy asks for a nude and you don’t want to send it.

Pretending that he didn’t understand

What? What did you say? A picture of me taking a shower? Like, from the shower? And then the conversation ends with a photo of your shower on. Pretending that you didn’t understand is a great alternative to many things in life. Pretend you’re not understanding what the guy says or that he completely misunderstood things.

Hidden in the dark

Send a totally dark photo and say that the lights are off and that’s why he can’t see anything. He can’t even tell that the photo isn’t really a nude.

Suggestive Knees

Depending on the angle, your other of the body parts may look like breasts or even a vulva. You can fool the guy with a photo of your armpits together, or your knees together half covered with cloth or something like that. You just need to be creative and careful when it comes to taking the fake nude so it will really look like something else.

"You first"

You can also choose whether to show yourself as the most provocative person of this relationship and ask the guy to send a nude of him first. Be very suggestive in the request, with a smiling face. It will be perfect! The guy will end up sending you a picture of him and when he asks you for his photo again, resend his nude. XD

Automatic messages

Pretend that you are a mobile carrier or a company offering a promotion and send a message in the style of an automatic SMS. For example: "Congratulations, you’re our 1000th customer. You just won a frost-free refrigerator for free. To confirm, send the message I WANT". If he keeps insisting, send another message in the same style. And continue in this scheme until the guy gets tired.

No makeup on

A "naked photo" can have several meanings. For some women, being without makeup is pretty much being naked. You can pretend to be these types of girls and send a picture of your face grimacing with no makeup at all. It’s not even a lie. In the photo you really are the way you came to the world.

Just “no”

You can opt for the good and old "no". Short and right to the point. You're not supposed to do it, darling, so you don’t have to send him a nude if you don’t want to. Send a "No, thank you very much" and be happy with it. If he keeps insisting, throw a lock on the guy so you won’t. You won’t be missing much.
Now, treating the matter a little more seriously, being careful is never too much. Be very cautious with the kind of person you exchange nudes with. If you want to send them, feel free to do so, as it is your choice. But do it with people you at least already know and trust. Yes, safety in sex is necessary in the digital world as well.

If you trust him, go ahead

It’s very good to receive a spicy photo of the person we’re with. In addition to being horny, it makes us happy and more interested.
If you're with a real man and you're comfortable in doing that, if you want to send it, then send it.
"Oh, but what if we end it and he releases it later?"
If you think he would do this, then you don’t trust him. So don’t send him anything.

My nudes are on the internet!

Another important thing to consider is how you would handle the situation if your nudes were to stop on the internet. After all, you never know when these pics can leak.
A survey done by Safernet, which for eight years has been monitoring crime on the Internet, shows that in 2014, 224 cases of intimate image leakage on the internet were sent through mobile applications – a number that has quadrupled since 2010. most of these cases, according to the entity, is revenge porn, which is when the partner discloses the intimate images exchanged with the woman for revenge after a breakup or betrayal. According to Safernet, 81% of people who asked them for help because they had images that were criminally exposed on the Internet were women.
The fact is that many men take advantage of the girls' feelings towards them to ask for nudes, regardless of whether or not they are dating. And the girls end up yielding, even without really liking these types of things. They do it more to please the guy.
Assessing the partner's level of trust and commitment is the first step in measuring if it’s safe to do this. Even then, there is never any guarantee that the photos won’t leak. Even if the partner is discreet, the cellphone can be stolen, lost or in need of repair, which already poses a huge risk of exposure. Sexting is not only used by couples who are in a serious relationship, but also as a way to approach casual sex – which is not always comfortable for both parties, especially the woman.
Some even go through situations like "I got a nude from a guy I like. He asked for one of mine. I didn’t send it and he blocked me on WhatsApp, Facebook, etc".
It's more than clear what kind of intent that this guy had, right? He wasn’t a nice guy ... You'll see you dodged a bullet, because what ensures that your erotic poses or more intimate parts wouldn’t stop on the web or at least circulate among his friends?
So, if you went through this, my friend, it was better for you to have been blocked, believe me! You may even like him, but he sure doesn’t like you. If he did, he wouldn’t have blocked you because of a photo. Better not to cry over someone like that and move on.

Other ways to act after a request for nudes:

• If you like him, but only to the point of casual sex and nothing else, and you have no problem if your photos and videos get leaked on the net, then okay. Send what you want and bear possible consequences later;
• Another tip is to keep his nudes, if a basic revenge is needed against his indiscretion. Although it doesn’t solve the problems that exposure of intimacy can cause;
• When sending nudes, hide your face. Make it difficult or completely impossible for you to be identified;
• You can also take print screens of your conversations, including the shared images and his name, or any other relevant data, in case the guy is a coward. This way, you will know who posted the image.
• If you want to send nudes to multiple guys, never send the same photo, to make it easier to identify in case some of them leaks.
Girls, it can be fun, modern, but think before sending them. Do you really need to send this to show how much you love him? Love has anything to do with this? If he's pushing me to get my most private photos, does he really like me?
Pressure is not a good sign. If you’re not sure, it’s best not to send anything, nor allow your boyfriend to tape you during sex.
Every woman should decide what to do with her own body, I agree. But the problem here goes far from an adult who decides, on her own, to sign a contract with a men's magazine and pose without her clothes on.
What we can’t accept is people taking advantage of the feelings of others, especially inexperienced girls, to achieve anything, even if it’s just photos – and use them in an extremely harmful way.
Time and again in the national and foreign media there’s news of a girl who committed suicide because she couldn’t stand the consequences of the unauthorized disclosure of her intimacy.
The situation can be quite complex because, even when it’s possible to know who spread the content, who started it, the guy can simply say that he had his cellphone stolen, among other excuses.
So, think a lot before sharing nudes, even if you think this might be fun. Showing up live and and doing things face to face can be so much better – if that's the case.

I don’t want to spoil your fun

You see, this is a delicate matter. Despite several reasons listed for great caution, there are reasons and advantages to sending nudes.

You feel confident

Taking a naked photo is one way to feel more confident. Learning about the sensuality of your own body, how beautiful you are, is one of the best ways for you to increase your self-esteem. Use and abuse of your mirror in those days when you feel good about yourself. There's nothing wrong with taking a picture of yourself, okay?

Sending nudes spice up the relationship

Let's assume that your boyfriend or husband is traveling to work. You guys miss each other a lot and it's still going to take a while for him to come back. Why not use a photo to deal with distance? Sending nudes is one way for you to spice your relationship – and it works as a preliminary. But it's always cool to ask first if the person wants the picture, okay? You can send a message like, “Today I'm feeling very sexy and ready for you, do you want to see?”. Consent is the keyword.

It’s an incentive

When the routine is too much, it’s normal for the relationship to become a little boring. Sending nudes can be an incentive for the other person to leave the house and think about different things for you to do together. A picture of these plays with the imagination of a person and enters the realm of sexting, where you exchange dirty messages to take advantage of this later.

You feel empowered

The body is yours and you have the right to do whatever you want with it. If you want to take a naked picture and it post on Instagram, you can (actually, Kim Kardashian herself has done this several times!). If you want to send nudes to your boyfriend, you can it too. It's your choice to take a picture without clothes on for the reason you want. Seeing your naked body can teach you a lot about self-love and about loving who you are.
So, you liked my tips? Do you know what you're going to say when you receive that inconvenient "send nudes"? If you've used any other cool technique to deny this kind of request, share with me in the comments!